Phew!
I've been bogged down in the day to days lately.
Feeling a little off of my game. Laundry piling up, to-do list growing, fridge bare.
That nagging feeling of being disconnected from the kids while I'm caught up in my own headspace.
It's times like these that I start feeling like I should be itemizing those to-do lists.
For example, in a bullet point under "Laundry" I should also write "strip, wash, and remake all beds". That way, when I change all three beds but don't finish the laundry I'll still see something crossed off the list.
Remember when making your bed was the chore of the day? Then, the next you would bring all of your library books back to the library and be able to call that a day.
Now, when I'm knee deep in a pile of various sized socks that I haven't sorted in three consecutive weeks, it's hard to remember to put it into perspective.
Hard to remember that the reason the sink is full of dishes is because I washed all of the previous dishes, cooked food, fed the children, and piled the sink back up again.
I'm tired of this headspace though. I'm tired of feeling like I'm not doing enough.
I should simply remember to be proud! Making three beds usually happens on the same day that I cook (at least) two meals large enough for (at least) five bellies, do (at least) two loads of dishes, wipe (at least) the kitchen table, answer (at least) 50 billion questions about physics and the state of the world, while always thinking ahead to what had to get done next.
(I made this egg bread braid for Easter, and I still am fretting about not "doing it all"!?!)
So, somewhere over the course of this afternoon I declared last week "Spring Break" and I'm letting go of all of the guilt and feelings of inadequacy.
Everything that I have done is done enough!
What's more, is that is has been done well enough!
Next week deserves a clean slate, not to be burdened by the to-do list anxiety of last week.
I've been carrying two mantras close to my heart these past few days (weeks?) as I've trudged through.
"The days are long but the years are short."
And, of course, one of my old favorites,
"Life is work. Life is life. Life is."
